I will not say it is a self-help book. Instead it is handbook where you can learn tips to deal with people effectively. I personally use this as a handbook, writing notes in it, reading it again and again with only one goal-to win over friends and lead people effectively.
If you are yet to read it, first go through the 5 golden rules listed here which are also explained in the book in detail by Dale Carnegie. With over 16 million copies sold and equal amount of people learning from it, it makes a must read book to learn how to deal with people.
As a fun fact, Warren Buffet quoted this in his praise, “Carnegie changed my Life” and it’s no secret how Buffet has climbed his richness. Let’s get started.
1 Appreciate more, Criticize Less.
Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain and most of them do. People hardly criticize themselves, no matter how big their mistake is. Don’t be a fool finding others fault.
Even animals learn quickly and retain more when loved and appreciated, think how much it can do if experimented on humans. Criticism are boomerangs, they will return back to us. Instead try to understand if you would do the same in their shoes.
2 People are Emotions.
Humans have never been and will never be creature of logic. We all are creature of emotions. No matter how intellectual we are, we are still a creature of emotions.
If we keep this in mind, we would never talk with logic first instead with emotion other people feel and validate.
Benjamin Franklin said, “I will speak ill of no man, and speak all the good I know of everybody.”
3 Ultimate Desire.
The deepest urge in the humans is one’s desire to be important. Most of other goal and desire are have their origination in the desire to be important and be appreciated more. Take a pause and think about it.
Civilizations thrived based on this urge. People who go insane find a feeling of importance in that insanity which makes them stay the same, away from reality.
4 Avoid Flattery.
There is a thin line between appreciation and flattery, appreciation is sincere, and flattery is not. Flattery works some times, but in the long run, it will hurt you more than help.
Sincere people discern flattery and avoid people who are insincere with appreciation. One good solution to it to think about good things of other people and we would not require to use flattery, instead we can be more sincere with appreciation.
Always give honest and sincere appreciation
5 Empathize more.
Since our birth to this day, every one of us do things because we want do it. If you remember this, when we meet people and talk to them, you will talk what they want to do, rather than talking what you want to do.
Dale has explained in detail that if there is any Secret to success, it is to see things from that person’s point of view and yours as well. The more you empathize with them, less you talk about self and sincerely think about others.
Way Forward: I hope these 5 golden rules help you in tough situations. Save it and try to implement these, only when you experiment and apply what you learn in books, you evolve. So try these and if possible read the book in detail.
The article is totally based on the Book by Dale Carnegie. As a blogger, I support his work and thank him for his valuable contribution taking no credit of his original work.
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